On Getting Older

This year, I’m turning 28.

I no longer log into Facebook to see updates on my friends’ lives anymore. They don’t surprise me anymore. Someone’s either getting attached, engaged, married or pregnant. Instead, I read news updates on my feed. I share interesting stories with people I thought of that day. I miss a lot of people nowadays.

I cry a lot. And I cry easily these days. I think of my dad, and I cry. I think of my sis, and I cry. I think of the nephews and niece who are growing up too fast, and I cry.  I think about lost moments, about old friends and the what-ifs, and I cry. I think a lot these days.

I get sentimental. It’s funny. But when I was much younger, I was always chasing a better future. A brighter, happier, more peaceful future, which I hold now. But now that I am in it, I reminisce the past a lot now.

I have those conversations with old friends. Do you remember those days we were…? Those were good times indeed, huh? It is difficult to recall much of what used to be, there’s very little I can remember without asking someone from my past – maybe it is because I had been too busy back then chasing the future, and now that I have reached the destination, I think to myself in a soft timid whisper:

“What now?”

 

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